May angels lead you in

There are some people you meet in life, who you know you have to respect. Chitchat was one of those special people. "Such a cute old man!" I remember thinking when he walked into class a little over a year ago, much the same way he did for next two semesters he taught us. I remember telling dad, after one of his first classes that he reminds me of that wise old turtle,Oogway in KungFu Panda.

Whether it was the warmth in his voice when he taught us, or the free attendance, or simply the sight of him walking around the Campus, it always managed to bring a smile to most student's faces! He was soo worried when he used to see the attendance register, and say "Uff!", in a way only he could. To him I was the 'Hyderabadi', who used to sleep in class 'cause of all the rice I had, Saumya and Aditi were girls from Lucknow, Sukku ( who was arguably one of his favorite students) had very 'neat handwriting' (a moot point when it comes to most people in class) and the best, Thara was an exchange student sent by the Mizoram Government.

One thing that always struck me about that man is his genuine happiness, he was one of the most happiest people I have ever met. I know I'll miss seeing him walk around in College, I know I'll miss him asking me how I'am doing, and yeah, I ll also miss running into him at Reliance Fresh.

Here's to the man he was, the teacher he was, here's simply to our dear old Chitchat! Yes Sir, we will miss you! As Animesh said he is going to a happier place.

What's on Your Mind? by Anonymous

I woke up in the morning to find a mysterious looking email in my inbox. I open it carefully fearing it might be a virus, the address from which it was sent looked well shady. However there was a sweet message saying nice things about me and request to post the attached entry on my blog! Well, that melted my heart, and I decided to read it, and it was pretty entertaining and funny, that was something I'd wanted to write about from quite sometime, so I decided what the hell!

Hence, here goes nothing

A simple and seemingly innocent question. Four words. I mean what’s the big deal right?

Maybe there is, and maybe there is not. There is absolutely no reason why you should concur with me. I have come to terms with the fact that there are no absolute truths.  There’s no reason why anyone’s opinion should be subservient to another’s. Chuck, I am digressing, and that’s not the point I intend to assert in any case. 

That’s not what’s on my mind.

For me, it wasn’t kind of a big deal. Until 15 minutes back. Boom! An idea popped in my head, and consumed me so much so, that I had to write it down. Ha ha, I know what you are thinking. I am not stoned, nor sloshed. It’s such a simple thought, yet all-encompassing and consuming.

Why should I share what’s on my mind? Why should anyone? It’s kinda difficult for me to catch up with my own thoughts, and before I lose track: when I talk about what’s on your mind, I mean all these status messages on these whack a doodle do social networking sites, gtalk and the kind. (If you still don’t get what I am talking about, this is the place where you are supposed to stop reading and go back to whatever you were doing)Simple forwarded, ccped , funny messages are fine, what I am talking about here is the not so eloquent, not so artistic, not so complex, ordinary everyday thoughts, your thoughts. This is not to say that those of you who are gifted and can express yourself are not included. I am also not talking about bloggers and the like or people who have a point to make, freedom of speech and expression and thought and stuff...nay Sir/Ma’am I am myself a big proponent and supporter of this essential right, so don’t think too unkindly of me... simple ordinary folks is what I am talking about here.

Anonymity is definitely not the reason. In fact, unless you have your privacy settings and stuff sorted out right, you are sharing your thoughts with the whole wide world. (I am saying this from my very limited technical knowledge.) The whole world. All it takes is the right keywords, a simple google search, and there you are, wide open to the whole wide world. Voila! You just shouted out loud at a party exactly what you were thinking about, only a very very big party. Well maybe the analogy isn’t right, but you get the picture. The BIG picture. Well why not go out and tell it to real people. People around you. People you can talk to.

Sure, you could say that I can write whatever bulls**t I feel like. But hey, comeon, unless you are trying to throw the FBI/CIA and the like off your tracks by posting random blabber, you do end up mostly posting what’s exactly on your mind. And if it actually is false (in which case you need to get some serious s**t sorted out), why even bother with the whole charade?

So my point is this: Why would anyone in their right minds shout out loud to the world his/her thoughts? Why would anyone want to bare their soul, their mind? Aren’t our thoughts supposed to be our most private confines of our existence? To be shared with only a select handful, unless you are running for public office, or have to spread some major propaganda or the like.

Does it make anyone feel better, that somehow you have become part of a large virtual conglomeration, like a Sunday mass, where you can talk with the person standing next to you, and so can he/she, but there are absolutely no strings attached? Does it make you feel any better that people will like your thoughts, comment on it? Does it then give you a sense of gloating pride in acceptance from names whose faces you haven’t even seen in a while, and maybe even strangers? Does it give you a sense of comfort in the self pity that you are glorifying or is it the other reactions you seek to incite in other mortals, which make you feel like you just bedazzled everyone at Broadway with your excellent performance?

What is your addiction?

I am quite the sinner myself, for I have shared my mind quite frequently, as am I doing now. I wanted to put this point across, so here it is, my thoughts, my mind laid down on the platter for your appraisal. Yet as a token of atonement, I am hiding behind the garb of anonymity here...nah, am just screwing with your head. I am doing it for the heck of it. However, I am still confused. Confused as to why would anyone share as to what’s on their mind?

Maybe its how humans are supposed to be, all along. We might have come a long way from living in tribes to 

nuclear families, to live ins, but deep down a part of us refuses to change. Deep down, we still need to remind ourselves that we are a part of something larger than the 2-3 people we share a roof with. Technology has only made it easier, merely provided a platform. Deep down we still feel the need to be bonded, the need to feel needed.

Dear Anonymous,

Thank you. A big fan already! 

Sincerely,

Sneha

R-OH (We all know what it is!)

Well, it's just over half past 12 and I just can't seem to get myself to do anything! So well , I finally put that Copyright symbol on my blog, and yeah so it's finally properly protected!!

Law School life is tough! Well admit it or not, R-OH (well more popularly known as alcohol) may not magically make it easy, but it well you know, helps you through it. Study hard  five days a week, and use the rare free weekend to well 'bust' your stress.

What is the first thing you do when you plan a party, well after deciding who to invite and whom to ignore, yes ladies and gents, you decide the booze! Whisky, Rum, Vodka, and others..Hours are spent deciding on the quantity, the brands, and most importantly the costs (well not in all cases though).

 Alcohol adds life to most parties. It makes making friends easier. As I was telling my friend the other day, "A few pints down, everyone becomes your friend". A very important tenet of alcoholics which well gets proven time and again. All those who disagree, you can put your hand up, and just let it be there! I don't really care.

Knowing about alcohol improves your geography and pronunciation, well how in the world would you have learnt how to pronounce Gorbatchow? or the right way to say Absolut?  My point exactly!

Alcohol I think is the A that comes after the three Cs that unite India. Well here's an example.
A dear friend of mine wanted to drink oneday, and she took her friends along and went to the shop only to realise that it was a dry day! They got into an auto and well, the more adventurous asked the auto driver if he knew any dealer, well the auto driver promptly agreed to take them to one, and yeah took them around till they found one. On the way they also got to hear gems like "I used to work in Goa, and the whole of Goa knew me" I heavily suspect that he was under the influence of some spirits too!!
Yes.True Story.

Here's to the Highs and the Hangovers and to the man who, apart from being my booze mentor, is also an amazing father (Happy Birthday, again!)!  Happy Drinking!!

The "Bhai" Phenomena

The world of NLU never fails to amaze me. The people, the places, our mysterious ways and life in general. Funny and weird things are part of our daily life. One of these which has recently caught my eye is the 'bhai' phenomena.Nope, we don't have a pan chewing, black kurta pyjama wearing and black sunglass wearing mafia in NLU. I am talking about the free and unfettered usage of the word, well you know it, 'bhai'.

Here's an example. One day three people were walking back from classes on the long winding road that runs through NLU. One of them is a lanky Ghazibadi Boy, a Hyderabadi Girl and a Mizo boy.They seem to be in the middle of a discussion which seems to quite engaging, and suddenly the girl exclaims, 'Bhai! what is he saying?". Well if you think it's a very North Indian phrase, well, Surprise Surprise!!

Yep, the girl who spent her entire life in Hyderabad in a very South Indian household, and who until she joined NLU was Hindi illiterate (well look forward to a very entertaining post on the North Indianization of Sneha G Sindhu) has just used the very popular NLU word.

The word 'bhai' is generally the shortened form of 'Bhaiyya' which means brother. However in NLU it is used to persuade, as form of exclamation, to express joy or anger, and sometimes used 'just for the sake of it' It is often used as a very desi substitute for 'dude'.

A bunch of girls sitting in Cool Palace also often punctuate their conversation about Gucci shoes and Fendi bags with a well placed Bhai! Well they also refer to eachother as bhai. Yeah, I have a very close friend of mine who keeps saying 'bhai' all the time!

When I went home this winter I was talking to my very Hyderabadi cousin, and my grandmom was nearby. And so I said, "Bhai, what nonsense blah blah blah...."

My grandmom froze! She could not believe her ears! She promptly walked upto me and said "Sena don't speak like an auto driver!"

 Sadly it's true......in Hyderabad its mostly the auto drivers who use bhai. So if you ask to go to Badi Chowdi, expect to hear a "Bhai, mai to nai jaathu....vahanpe is time pe bahut traffic hai!"

After that I spent a precious half an hour explaining to my gran that its weird and unladylike thing in Jodhpur! Yes, she did say that oneday I'll end up speaking like a truck driver!!

Hence in NLU if you are a Delhite, or a Punjabi, someone from Chennai, or from the Northeast you will end up picking up the 'bhai' culture in your 5 years of stay here.

To finish off, as Saumi and I always say

"We are the Bhai, we are the bhai!"

P.S. thanks Lohitash for the idea!!

What all do WE care about?

 This morning I was tweeting very harmlessly (except for the Death threat I sent to the Pro-Telangana person), and my page kept getting updates about one Rebecca Black from the Harry Potter page on twitter, yeah and so, what is the first TWEET I see?





"I'll say it again. I don't hate Rebecca Black and I don't want her dead. Why would I? Yes she sings like a dying Hippogriff but really, now."


Since I am generally I step or two behind most tweeps I know, I type Rebecca Black in the little blue search box in Twitter (Oh! how I love twitter) and lo and behold! I see a million other tweets echoing the same emotion! Well after reading about 10 to 20 tweets I found out the follwing:


1.She is an 8th grader.


2.American ( what else? can she be? ). From California (again?)


3.She can sing say some.


4.She thinks she can sing say some more.


5.There are some who say she can't.


6. She released a song on YOUTUBE (yes yes like that lil blond guy we all know)


7.She called the song FRIDAY.


8.Also she wants to record a single with her 'idol' yes yes none other than Pretty Boy Biebs! ( I can't believe I just said that! )


9. The song is about how a teenager cannot decided whether to sit on the front seat or the back seat of a car. Wow! So cool na? I 'll also write a song about how I cannot decide what to eat? Paneer Makhani or Kadai Paneer! 


10. She is apparently out trended the Japanese Earthquake over the weekend!


The last point actually got me thinking! Wow do more people really care about a teenage girl blaring than about lives lost and property destroyed in Japan? That got me thinking What do we really care about?


On an average day in the world these days there's a political coup, or the aftermath, there's a natural disaster of some magnitude, there's a financial breakthrough, and oh there's also a sporting event and yeah like last week a 'Teenage Sensation" on the internet!  


I decided to poke around a bit and I found out that Rebecca did out trend the earthquake,Gaddafi, the Cricket WC and other more important things. Another shocker this happened not only on Google Trends but also on Twitter, Facebook and other social networks! Really? did the earthquake become boring now, in a little over a week? Are our attention spans that short, and are we that shallow? 


This is just another example of the myriad of things that we willfully choose to ignore in our busy lives! Tho kya? Japan mein earthquake tha, log mare the, India mein bhi tha tsunami, earthquake? I'd rather spend hours reading about this new chick who has biebered her way into my weekend! Let me laugh at her, let me call her the "BLACK PLAGUE", or the latest, let me make a parody out of her song! Yes, I am not lying there was a parody already on YOUTUBE!


Do TV channels and internet sites really dictate what we care about and what we don't? Do we really need them to decide for us what and when to like a thing? They tell us what to like, what to buy, what story is hot, they decided when a story loses importance, they tell us what is the new story! Maybe it is right, maybe its better that way, 'cause if you let everyone decide what they want to care about, yes, we will get more people fulfilling their 'teenage dream's! and that my friends will not be pretty! 


So then that got me thinking what is the one thing near home that I have actually cared about? What? Oh yea! I absolutely hate the fact that my city, my beloved Hyderabad is being destroyed! For what? So that a man's thirst for political power can be quenched? the statues destroyed may not be as famous as the Buddha statues, but to me, they symbolise a childhood spent running around in the green grass around them, of many Sunday evening spent near "Pedda Laala"! It was just sad to see hundreds of people walking on Tankbund, all this for what? For NOTHING! I wish they'd just leave my city alone! Yes, I care about it! 


Maybe Rebecca will record a new single with her idol (good for her!), I would love to record a single with Avril! It's ok if the Earthquake takes second place in google trends as long as efforts are being made to help the sufferers. All that really does not matter as long as people care about all that that has to be cared about! Peace.

A general update on how things are!

Yes. Yes. It's summer here, well almost. Yes, yes it's that time of the year when there's dust, and sand everywhere and you risk getting stuck in the midst of a sandstorm every time you walk back from the library to the Hostel. And yes, I am over reacting!

Firstly here's a big hug to Tangypoison, as it got an awesome review the other day, or was it a compliment? Well remember folks, a few months ago I wrote about Shivam the Rooftop Restaurant, yeah as my really nice floor mate tells me that the owner of that place claimed to know me as I had written that post and he claimed several NLU people had come there after reading it on my blog! Well good good if he thinks his business has risen thanks to my blog, yeah next time I go, I ll introduce myself (Yes, anything in the hope of free food!).

Secondly here's a new embarrassment in the author's life, earlier today while taking attendance in class, JPKJ looks at me and says:

"Are you able to follow in class? Do you understand? How much did you get in the last test?"

Ugh! Never in my 20 years of living did anyone ever say that! Oh by the way I managed a decent 15 out of 20 in that miserable test of his! I ll show him in the next test, yes I will!! Yes, I only ‘look’ confused, sleepy and dumb in class!

 I have noticed a recent spurt in the number of status messages aiming to give a message to other people, yes, I am not denying that they were always there, but all I am saying is that there has been a sudden increase in their number! Well imagine this, you log into your g talk hoping to play catch up with your friends, and you end up seeing status messages like those, and yes, you will feel scared! You'd think twice before pinging them!

Think about it, would you rather ping a person whose status says "Fairy Tales and Chocolate Cookies" or "is trying to go back to where it all began"? This is no offence to anyone, and both the above stated status  messages were your truly's at different points of her life! I am not saying putting statuses's like that is wrong or against the world order or messages like that will ring in the apocalypse or anything, all I am saying is, that well, they tend to scare people who really love you, and care about you. 

You have the freedom to put any status message you want, as long as it does not offend anyone, or ward off any random chat seekers like me! I would still reiterate my point that I really don't mind reading all those messages, you may have written them in absolute fury, but they actually seem quite funny to the people who read them. In-fact the status messages that I write when I am superbly pissed with something\someone make good jokes when I am simply being me.

 I believe it's the growing heat that is messing up people's heads, and making them HOT! Which in turn is manifesting itself in the form of those scary and dangerous status messages!!

On other news Sheelaism is growing, and growing pretty well,I  must say to the utter dismay of the hangover man. Who, by the way, claims I have misquoted him, and I duly apologize. We have named our new Microwave Sheela, and he has taken to calling us blasphemers, yes, I know one day he will wake up to the truth that is Sheela.

So until next time, it's TOODLES!!

SHEELAISM by SAINT BUSHY HAIR!

For most people who know her she is a kind looking ( yes, notice the word LOOKING) girl with a psychedelic choice in phone covers, but for others like me, who know her a little more than most people, she’s a little off the road normally taken. Well, on a cloudy day, after her TOPA moot she decided to embrace ‘Sheelaism”, and become SAINT Bushy Hair. For all the losers who do not know what SHEELA is, it is SHEELA from SHEELA KI JAWANI, from the very sasta movie Tees Maar Khan, but all this is not what this post is about!

This post is devoted entirely to the philosophy that is Sheela. As Bushy says, it is more than a song, Sheela Ki Jawani has a deeper meaning. It is a Bhajan, yes, people she even sings like a bhajan, so, if you catch her singing it, don’t be surprised.

Bushy says, there is Sheela in everybody, yes, that is why the lyrics, WHAT’s MY NAME? WHAT’s MY NAME? and you must find and embrace the Sheela in you. The song is the ultimate expression of feminism. And there is no specific dress code for the religion, or cult (whatever you choose to call it) yes, ladies and gentlemen, this interpretation flows directly from the line “I am too sexy for you” that translates to “I am whatever I am and I have self-respect for myself, and I don’t need you to tell me what I am and what I am not.”

When you are actually writing about a belief, it’s always prudent to give the two sides of the coin. Here’s a warm welcome to our other expert in this matter, “Hangover Man”, he simply disagrees with Bushy. He says, while sitting on the breakfast table, the song is an expression of Carnal Desire. Well, this made a bystander (bysitter?) quip, “Goddess of Carnal Desire”? Well, think about it folks!!

Yes, listen to this song again, find the inner meaning in it. Respect the belief, respect the Sheela in you, and most importantly, RESPECT YOURSELF!! So now its time for me to go wake up Saint Bushy Hair from her sleep so she can indulge in her evening rites. SHEELA!

Technologically challenged!!

Like the Cable guy in my grand parent's house, all electric appliances around me seem to hate me! Yeah my Music players, my phones, my pendrives, my Cameras, my Laptops, my hair driers and my biggest enemy, MICROSOFT WORD. Yes, Bitches ( you know who you are) I can hear you snigger already!

Here's an example of what happened very recently, we bought the VSFC jerseys, and decided to take photos in the mess with all the players, it was good fun, and I took some great shots! We come back to the Hostel, and another funny photo session ensued. After that I promptly run downstairs to Shraddha's room to get the USB, and after attaching the USB to my Laptop, I click to open the folder, an MS word which says the following, pops up!

"HAHAHAHA I AM VIRUS 'SOME CHINESE SOUNDING NAME', F*** YOU, ALL YOUR PHOTOS ARE GONE, HAHAHAHAHAHA!"

Yes, it took me a full 5 minutes to figure out that all my photos were actually deleted, sucks right? Temme about it! My bad luck with multiple I pods, has resulted in my dad finally buying me a PHILLIPS MP3 player, this thankfully has last the longest till now. True Story.

All the 'GIZMO'TIC people in my class who talk torrents, incriptions, proxies, and other complicated stuff, scare the living daylights out of me! Makes me wonder, was I dead when they taught technology in school? Maybe, 'cause people say knowing shortcuts in MS WORD is common sense? how in the freaking hell can it be common sense? Sorry, I don't think so.

Surprisingly the only electronic thing that has not caused me any trouble till now is my blog, now I really don't want to explain why a blog qualifies as a technology, but, for the sake of some of my readers, who love to argue with me, here's how

LAPTOP =TECHNOLOGY

So anything that comes with a computer is a technology! My efforts to format my memo are to my friends as entertaining as probably watching RUSSELL PETERS on TV, yes, how they enjoy spreading the tales of my incapability to remove an underline to everyone the FREAKING see!! True Story, again! That Saturday morning is one I'd kill to forget!

It's like wherever I step electrical things are either dying or bursting into life. It's like when I am around, they have to show their displeasure in extremely dangerous ways! I mean like that time, where the elevator doors almost killed me, yes, they guard actually said, Madam they hardly ever close! Yes, it's me, I am more convinced than ever now!!

But then being the SUPER TECH wiz can also get very annoying to people around you, yeah like LAN clogging, and stuff like, however I choose not to comment on things I dunno about!

Also on the point of blogs, my college, now has its own version of Gossip Girl who has something to say about everything from teachers to students to the MESS WAR! It's all in good fun and makes for a good read and you can read it here. So carrying on the GG spirit its me Sneha signing off,

YOU KNOW YOU LOVE ME,

XOXO!

Cadby's ( I don't remember how it's spelt!)

Firstly I'd like to thank Roshni for telling me about this place, and more importantly the CHOCOLATE SHOT! Yes, it's mindblowing!!

So on a Wednesday evening Aditi and I set out to the city, and on the way decided to check out this place. It's on B-Road just off Children's Park are, hidden in a little lane full of computer shops. It's just next to the big DELL poster.

A walk through the glass doors reveals a nicely done up place. It has two floors, you can place your order and decide to sit either on the ground or upstairs. As we saw the menu, Aditi and I let out a gasp of  happiness ( ok can you gasp with happiness? No idea), there was chocolate everything! There was a section of food, a cadbys section, a thick shakes section and of course there were ice creams!

Food included the usual Pizzas, burgers, pastas and Sandwiches. Not a big range but you do have a choice. The thing that caught my eye was the CHOCOLATE SANDWICH and the CHOCOLATE GRILLED SANDWICH! However, as we were sure that this was only one of the many trips we would be making to this place, Aditi and I decided to order a Pizza. Imagine our surprise that when we ordered the lady at the counter said that there was a buy a pizza get one free offer! For two super hungry people that came as a welcome surprise. The Pizza was alright for the price, and it was pretty nicely flavored. Zara, who went there today says that the Special Garlic bread was awesome, and she suggest Chocolate CadB and White CabB.

We ordered the food, and went up the meandering stairs, and Lo and behold!there were big squishy and colorful bean bags and cute little chairs shaped like leaves and bright red flowers! I almost screamed in delight! I quickly settled myself in the squishiest and the biggest beanie. Yes, that was satisfaction. Sadly our delight was only momentary as we were soon joined by the Jodhpur version of Romeo and Juliet, and we quietly made our way down the spiral staircase.

You have to try the Cadby shakes, they are normal shakes but made with real cadbury! Yes, you can actually taste the Cadbury! There are various flavors like Hazel nut, Almond, Snicker Bar, Mint, etc. Aditi ordered a Hazel Nut Cadby and I went in for a Snicker Bar Cadby, and they were BRILLIANT! Nicely made, and very very very chocolatey.

There were other things like thick shakes of different flavors like strawberry chocolate, Coconut and White Chocolate, I think there was Kiwi and Chocolate, or maybe that was Passion Fruit. 

Now coming to my favorite thing of the evening, and believe me, all chocoholics out there, YOU HAVE TO TRY this : The much famed, chocolate shot. Comes in two variants the normal chocolate shot and the Ferrero shot, yes it does taste like Ferrero! To Chocolate!

You can also buy pretty chocolates there, and give them away as gifts, like we did! They come wrapped in really cute packets, and range from anywhere between 100 bucks to 120 bucks.

The overall experience was good, the ambiance was decent also.  We thought the order could have come faster considering it was self service and all. Maybe the time will improve as time passes by.The bill was really really low, came upto a 100 per person, true! The chocolate shakes and the Cadbys come in variants to small medium and large, you can choose whatever fits your tummy or your pocket! Your choice!! Go there if you like chocolate, go there if you are bored of the other regular NLU-haunts, and lastly go there if you are ABSOLUTELY JOBLESS!!

BURRRP!!!!!!

Pritha Chatterjee!!!!! (Isn't that enough?)

I have just realised that my blog would have been incomplete without a post on this preposterously funny individual. She has tried and tested my patience many a time.You might have come across her name in many of my earlier posts. She makes my day go by in NLU. She has shocked and surprised me. She makes me  want to pull my ears off my head. She can have me going from LOW to Extremely HIGH in a few seconds ( though she does know a bit or two about being high, herself! )  She has in innate gift for cracking the most unimaginable sastaas ever! Yes, I am talking about the ever-present, and very loud PRITHA CHATTERJEE!

She is among other things an assiduous student, and I am a big fan of her mooting skills.She is a lovely person and yeah I think I have praised her enough. Her other 'skills' shall be explained and analysed in this very delayed post. The limelight lover that she is, Pritha sits right in, what can be called, the MIDDLE OF THE CLASS. Yes, a perfect place to sit, observe and comment on every single thing that happens in class. Her jokes range from plain dumb, to really cheap and very very perverted. Her jokes have our very dear Yum, shaking her head in frustration!

Last semester, Aditi came up for the reason for or rather came up with the medicinal term for Pritha's condition, yes ladies and gentleman it's Prithaeria. Symptoms range from yelling loudly in class, feeling the sudden need to crack lame jokes, and being being very very narcissistic and you also you may have sudden uncontrollable urges to sing loudly, yes, wherever you are. You might also have more than a few tongue in cheek moments, like the whole "necessity is the mother of invention............................................" incident. Prithaeria spread like wild fire and people went from stage one to stage five in a matter of days! We even had one casualty! and slowly Pritha became the official sastaa queen of NLUJ2013!

She plans on marrying the Oxford educated Bhilaval Bhutto, yes anyone who knows of anyway to contact the poor man, can contact me!

She thinks she's perfect, (she's almost, but we don't tell her that!) and calls herself 10 on 10! Her FB profile pictures are legendary, yes the person photographing her will forever have tales of her radiance, her awesome photogenic face, and most importantly the number of times that poor soul had to take her photos to get that one "PERFECT 10 on 10" shot! There are times when she can make you feel 'uncomfortable', yes she's very gifted in that sense too. Ask a few people in our very large class!

I have complete faith in her that she'll become one of India's best lawyers, but then again the SCC will want to quote all her sastaas, and our already miles long judgements will become longer, and Pritha Chatterjee will be quoted in moot courts and real courts across India. Yes, the Bong Bomb, who supposedly looks like a Bengali Actress will be remembered forever, her sastaas will outlive her! Yes, yes everything about Pritha is a loud, noisy and very striking affair whether its her voice or her crazy imagination. Love you Chatt, thanks for all the awesome times, and I am sure we shall have many many more!

Signing off,
Sneha.

"Guess what?"

A rumor they say is like a baby. It is generally conceived in a moment of heated passion, and cared and cultivated slowly. Everybody loves it and everybody has something to add to it. It is often very hard to actually get to the root of the rumor, nope, you can never find that one person who first planted it. Nope, not ever!

Maybe the first rumor was way back in the Stone Ages when a caveman's mother saw her husband's mate ( well this was before the institution of marriage, remember? ) looking at another hairy and 'handsome' ( yes, back then people actually did want hair on their body!) caveman, and spread the first rumor about,well, adultery. Yeah well, it could have actually happened. Yes back then in the Stone Ages a rumor was born in the pointing and grunting language of the stone people! 

As man evolved rumors also evolved with man. The earliest instances of rumors I have read about was in the Mughal era. In this really nice book I am reading. Shah Jahan's (yes its that dude who built the Taj for his dead wife, only) younger daughter Roshanara spreads a pretty disgusting rumor that her sister, Jahanara is sleeping with their dad, after her mum passed away! But yeah later in the book the little bitch gets what she deserves! But yeah think of it the atmosphere back then was PERFECTO for making and spreading rumors about well, heated moments of passion!

 You are a princess, young and bored, forced to stay with women all day, despite the fact that there are soo many hot dudes around you, I mean you can 'hear' them, hear about them, but you cannot see them! wow! So what do you do? All have time to do is sit around the whole day bitching about your elder sister. Yes, that skank, fathers favorite, everyone loves her! Jealous as you are, you just pop a few coins to a few eunuchs ( who are by the way pretty good at keeping their trap shut! more out of fear than anything else, I am sure) and ask them to stalk your sister who is obviously prettier and has more clout than you, when that does not work you resort to paying the eunuchs more and SPREADING what can be termed as the most DISGUSTING rumor of the Mughal Era.

As the society evolved rumor became more and more sophisticated and slowly there emerged a species of rumor called well, we all know it, GOSSIP! Just a minor difference, gossip is generally exaggerated  truth, and rumors are generally make belief. People slowly starting making a living out of well spreading gossip and rumor how else do you explain shows like TMZ? or channels like ZOOM and ZING? These days anyone with access to an internet connection can start a rumor. 

The recent rumor about Facebook shutting down in March sent the world wide web into a frenzy, I am sure when THAT does happen, all the stock markets in the world will CRASH! All hail Zuckerberg. You can read about it here! I found whole websites dedicated to analyzing rumors about Iphones ( welcome to the era of the muchly suppressed NERD!)! 

I guess rumors about gadgets is the new 'in thing', and rumors about filmstars are passe, yeah just like animal prints ( are they? not if you look around in our college! more on that later.). Movie stars these days are as public as you can get! Case in point : Koffee with Karan. They spread rumors about themselves, leaving common people like us to get all excited about, yeah well the IPHONE revolution ( Geek revolution is well and truly on!). Don't believe me? Google 'rumor'.

I am stuck within this 50 acres of land with 600 other supremely bored young adults like myself. The line here between gossip and rumor here is probably the thinnest in the world. What you see is what you spread, well not really. Everything has to be analysed and debated upon in the halls of living, in the mess, in the acad block ( I refuse to call it Halls of learning), in Cool Palace, Hans and Sweet Dreamland. The tales of a drunken friday night at Geoffreys are generally well documented for the whole college to know byMonday morning ( burrp! actually Saturday evening)! True Story. Ask. well, anyone.

Who's seeing whom, who went with whom to Pushkar, which is the latest catfight,who beat up who where? who 'likes' whom? who's a bitch and whos a snitch and my recent favorite, who's wearing what?? Which teacher is doing what to which teacher (lol!) , the list is endless. You make two of us sit in the mess, give us a cup of hot steaming coffee and we'll give you loadsa rumors ( or Gossip, or wadeva!). It generally starts with "You'll never believe what I heard/saw" or "Oh my God! Guess what happened?" and ends with "too much no?" or "I never thought that chick/dude was capable of doing THAT!". Ask anyone here they'' all say it's true.  Tried and tested.

So next time you hear a rumor, think twice, examine it and dissect it and try to get to the actual truth behind it all. Or maybe not. Just hear it and LEAVE IT BE.

Dunno what to call it.

"India is a puzzle.", said the grey eyed Professor Smith, as he quietly sipped the glass of scotch my grandad poured out for him. His face had the look of someone who had not only visited India, but also bothered to get away from the 5 Star Hotels and explore the 'real' India. "It makes you love it, but at the same time, you realise  it's not perfect." That day sitting in the living room of my house in DD colony, Hyderabad I realised how true he was.And how privileged I am.

The very next day, when I went to my usual teatime hang out spot outside the CAT with Edward, Anwar bhai, the magnanimous Naan wallah observed,"Indian mein na kuch bhi ho saktha hain, humari Dubai mein bahut strict hain loga". He claims to be a descendant of the Nizam. As he says to everyone who bothers to listen, his mother was the last Nizams concubine and he was born in Dubai. Yes readers, you might be all fascinated, but you roam around Charminar, you will find at least 10 more men like Anwar bhai. True Story.

My country scares me. It makes me think. I feel disgusted, at the same time I feel proud of being an Indian. The diversity is gut wrenching. Just the sight of a little boy begging near a big mall tell you a story. I have tasted champagne a bottle of which costs anywhere from 3000 rupees to well, I even saw a 90000 rupees worth champagne. There are millions of people who do not make that much money in a year in this country. 

Human Rights activists have maids to clean their house, and cooks to cook their food. 

The diversity is not limited to the economy. People in the North would not know what's  an Appam. I din't know what Bhujia was till I came to Jodhpur. I don't get what people mean when they say "I want to see real India.". Dude, you have landed in India, and so you are in real India, as opposed to a 'fake' India. DLF Promenade in Delhi is as much a part of India, as Lepakshi is. People still think India is full of snake charmers and old men with big black moustaches!Golly!

Yes, as I told my Lebanese neighbor in  the bus journey to Jodhpur, we speak Hindi not India. He wanted to know what water is called in 'Indian'. Whether it's in the bylanes of Charminar or in the Second Class compartment in the Rajdhani Express, Indians are Indians. We care. One day during my internship I was sick, and the next day I went back to have chai in Anwar Bhai's shop he gave me free 'Paya', and not chai. I can never forget the Assamese family who totally helped me stay calm in the much delayed train to Delhi. I was even offered a house to stay the night in. Yep, all cause my Gran got all senti and asked that lady to 'keep an

eye' on yours truly who was travelling alone in a train for the first time. Well, if the decree passed by Ammamma stays it could well have been my last train journey alone!

As we have all read in second grade there is unity in diversity in India. If some work does not get done over the table, whether we are from Banjara Hills or Siatafalmandi, we all look 'under the table'. Fat uncles (whether rich or poor, south Indian or North Indian) all over the country gyrated to the beats of Sheela and Munni and oh yeah, Justin Bieber on the New years night! And when New Year dawns we call our friendly neighborhood Astrologer, or go to the nearby Baba or attend the midnight mass or go to the mosque, Gurudwara, temple, etc.

Try as much as you can, you NRIs, you can never run away from your heritage. Nope not the fake accent, nor the fake Gucci sunglasses, or the cheap Christian Louboutins and not even the "Oh my God! my baby will not survive in India" can make you look non-Indian. No amount of hand sanitizer will rub away the Indian-ness, that is inherently there in you. You will still have to fight the urge not to litter and not to employ household help. Gotcha! 

We have all types here, the watchers, the hopers, the 'live'-ers and the prayers. Each group with it's own attitude and own beliefs. The guitar players and the Sitar players, the rappers and the classical singers, the pickle lickers and the Pizza eaters, the cheap roadside romeos and the hot suave college guys, the mountain climbers and the beach goers. 

I differ from what I said at the beginning of the post, My country does not scare me, it amazes and sometime amuses me!

P.S.- Another post which is a result of this never ending writer's block! 

Bad Hair Day. Everyday.

I totally get Harry Potter's frustration about his unruly hair. The fact that his mop of unruly hair gets mentioned at least once in all the books is a great credit to the hair itself! Harry, I sympathize with you, I know how it feels to have hair with a head of it's own. No matter how much you comb it, wash it, condition it, and as the fancy shampoo advertisements go, "take care of it", it still does what it wants.

I have been blessed, as some say or cursed, as I say with thick, wavy and most importantly unmanageable South Indian hair. As far as hair stories go, my hair has a pretty long tale. As Ammamma fondly remembers I was born with a crop of hair, so my hair troubles began on 21st September, 1990 itself. For as long as I could remember I had short cropped hair. Yet, everyday before I left for school my mum used to literally sit me down and struggle for 10 minutes to get my hair to 'not stand up'. By the time I got down in school my hair was just as it was before my mum combed it. Then thanks to my mum's and Sharon Aunty's combined efforts I had shoulder length hair by the time I was in class 4. So I let it grow, and took great care of it, it slowly started listening to me. At some point in class 6 I had even got one of those Pushkar type hair extensions in HOT PINK, don't even ask! 

However then class 6 summer holidays happened, and I suddenly decided to get all serious about my place in the swim team, yeah yeah, hard to believe now, but I was pretty good then. Hajira Mam happened and all of a sudden I decided to crop my hair! Yep! My mum was aghast, my music teacher, well let's not even go there. She almost fainted when she saw me! But then I found it really nice and very convenient. Even then, my hair used to never ever listen to me. NEVER EVER.

So my short cropped hair continued for quite a long time, sometime in class 10 I decided to grow it back, much to my mom's and grandmom's great relief! By the time my tenth boards finished and I came back from our awesome trip to visit daddy in Shillong, my hair was as long as it was in 6th. Then my real problems started. My hair as I sadly realised has some kind of energy with which it made up its mind to not do what I want it to! For as long  as I could humanly remember I wore a tight braid to Junior College, sigh! 

When I realised I made it to NLU, another fear overtook me. HOW THE HELL WILL I MANAGE MY HAIR? To my relief I managed it pretty well the first semester. Back then my hair was this long unruly mess, full of tangles! The desert winds have made it even more indisciplined. So, as year 2011 dawned upon me I made a decision. I decided I'd get get my hair cut off it reaches only shoulder. Yes, Sharon aunty was shocked once again, when I walked upto her, determinedly and said, "Please Aunty 5 inches!". She smiled sheepishly and said "Ok, sit". And an hour later, I realised to my HORROR, that my hair might not reach into a ponytail, but then it did! So, I begin this year with  shoulder length, OK, a Lil more than shoulder length,Sharon aunty left it there for good measure. 

So here's to probably having less bad hair days this year. Then again I realized how much I miss my long and unruly mop!